Thursday, March 29, 2012



UHpinions Exclusive

ok where do i begin?

well as soon as i walked i felt uncomfortable. it was like being a gay black jew in the south, even though im a straight white catholic in New York.

there was every manner of redneck and white trash in that dump. im pretty sure i even saw an obese gothic woman chain smoking.

but i continued on because i had friends that wanted some cheap food.

so i had 4 dollars left, thats all, i thought it would buy me some sort of sandwich or something. i spent a minute looking at the menu, nothing but huge, lard covered all-american shit-on-a-bun’s all for $5 or so. so i thought, screw it ill just get the cheapest thing there.

i walk up on an obscure line, were there is no real beginning. after reaching the cashier, she asked me what i wanted. i stated i wanted a w cheeseburger (or something like that). she does not tell me how much it costs, she doesnt tell me if thats all that i wanted, she just yells out next, and some ass with a smartphone in his hands thinking he’s freaking king of the neanderthals pushes up to were im standing.

i look at the receipt, just to make sure its under $4. it was $4.30 or something, even though the sign says $4. i ask her if i can change my order, i dont have enough money, and she says, either keep going and change it at the front cashier.

so unwilling to go back to the end of that “line” i keep going. i then change my order. the lady at the front is confused and brings the manager. i repeatedly try to tell here that i do not want the damn sandwich anymore. she then asks me what do i want instead, i asked for a caramel frosty shake. she at that point asked again if i still wanted the sandwich. i replied yet again NO.

so after waiting SEVERAL minutes, after my friends have already eaten, and many people who ordered the same as i had theirs, i finally get my order. only it was a parfait. who on earth mixes up parfait with milkshake? the lady who made it blamed it for reading the screen wrong. turns out that you dont have to read to get a job.

so i finally get my damn milkshake. $3.04 for something that looks like half a McDonalds small, which would have cost me $1.50 or so. and i FREAKING swear someone jizzed in my cup

Review by UHpinionist Jakub T.

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