Monday, August 8, 2011

Netflix

UHpinions Exclusive

Holy fuck these guys are good. Just short of sneaking in your room while you sleep and placing new releases in your ass like a mailbox, these guys bring movie renting to our spoiled and obese society on a silver platter.

Remember when you actually had to leave your house and physically rent a movie from a store? Bullshit! Netflix makes chronic masturbation at home all day even simpler. Don’t quote me on this, but I think new customers get a free jar of Mayo upon sign-up. Which is great, because you can deepfry a dominoes pizza and smear it in with your free mayonaise.

It only costs $8 a month for unlimited movies, even affordable for recently laid-off Blockbuster employees!

Overall, Netflix is a great idea and I can’t wait to wake up with the next Megan Fox movie in my asscrack.

Review by UHpinionist Dustin P.

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